I have many friends, but I still feel lonely .

I seemed to be going home after school alone frequently
Stares that I cannot take initially that tells me 'what? you're alone? where's your friends'? , I learn to accept them.
Going with my usual friend, she has her own clique now.
I know it's okay to mix around, know one another, but it's weird and super awkward especially in the mrt train, a feeling hard to describe-
You can only look at each other blankly.

I really hate it when people don't mean what they say.
It may not be intentionally, but I take it seriously.
I TAKE MY FRIENDS SERIOUSLY, for times of matter of importance.

She texted saying hoping we won't drift and what not,
But she's the one herself initiating all these from happening.
Even going home together seems to be a problem now.
What's next? having to go school alone soon?

I really really dread loneliness.

Bias friends are another case.
Seriously just fuck off from my life, don't come to me only when you need me.
Judges based on only looks, I really don't get it.

I'm sorry to say but the more I interact with you, your behaviour adds on more to my level of despise for you.


I guess I'm going to be independent from now on
I need evelynteo and goujun badly, these two days will be FML cos they are overseas.

*Sigh heavily. *

Well well, when is the last time I experienced this shiat?
Definately not in secondary school days.